


Car Troubles

by bearsinspace, KerriPamyuPamyu



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Drunk!Bucky, Steve is a good egg, drunk!Sam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-16
Updated: 2016-05-16
Packaged: 2018-06-08 22:10:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6875665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bearsinspace/pseuds/bearsinspace, https://archiveofourown.org/users/KerriPamyuPamyu/pseuds/KerriPamyuPamyu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All Steve wanted was a quiet night in with his documentaries, what he gets is a stressful night of wrangling drunks.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Car Troubles

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! So this is my first fic ever and I hope whoever reads this finds some joy out of it. This is the brain child of my friend and I's feeling about a tiny get-away car from civil war. Enjoy!

The microwaves hums as it nukes last nights left overs as he watches Bucky glide about getting ready, like watching a seasoned dancer as he effortlessly moves from room to room preparing for his night own, while Steve has his night in planned in the form of new WW2 documentary.

“Come on, Steve! Friday night is party night! Blow off some steam with me and Sam!” Bucky calls to him from the living room double checking he has his wallet and keys this time.

“Thanks but no thanks Buck, I've got my own plans,” Steve motions to the steaming bowl of food in his hands. Settling down on the couch and double checking the time, half an hour till it starts.

“Your loss babe, I'll try and not snap chat you too many dick pics,” With a parting kiss to Steve check Bucky leaves with a wave and a slam of the front door. With the apartment finally quiet Steve unmutes the TV and settles in for his exciting night of monotone narration and WW2 propaganda reels.

One left over dinner, a WW2 documentary and no less than 17 dick pics from Sam and Bucky, Steve finds himself jerking awake to the sound of his phone buzzing across the coffee table. 02:14 blinks at him as well as Bucky's name and the ridiculous selfie he set for himself. 

“Hello?” Steve mumbles into the phone, still waking up from his cramped sleep on the couch.

“Hey? This Steve? I've got two of your friends here, had a bit too much to drink, all I got out of them was to call this number” The guy who answer is not Bucky, that much Steve is sure of. 

“Christ, tell me the name of the bar and I'll come pick them up.” He's already up and sliding his shoes on when the guy gives him the address. With a quick thanks he hangs up and heads for the car. Wondering how in hell they managed to get to bar out of town, they said they were just going to a local bar for a few drink with the rest of the gang but then he remembers he's dealing with Sam and Bucky, and anything is possible where the two of them are concerned. 

About 20 minutes later he pulls into the car park and steps out with a sigh. He relaxes a little when he sees Bucky slumped against the wall and Sam looking far too happy for someone sitting outside at almost 3 in the morning. The guy who he's guessing called him shouts over “You Steve?” Steve nods his reply as the guy continues “Their description of you was pretty accurate: ' Blonde Adonis with eyes as blue as the sky.”

Steve blushes and ducks his head slightly “I..uh, just..Thanks, I'm so sorry if they broke anything or caused any trouble.” His heartfelt apology is interrupted by Sam stumbling to his feet and shaking Bucky.  
“STEVE! Hey, Buck c'mon wake up it's Steve, Let's get this party started!” Bucky jolts awake, slowly focusing on him as a smile spread across his face  
“STEEEEVIE! My knight in shining armour, have you come to rescue us?” Steve feebly smile back, it's going to be a long drive home.  
Just getting into the car was hell.  
Steve's old three door Beatle was not drunk friendly and he realised this as the drunk pair wrestled between the front seats.  
“I called shotgun Bucky, get your arm out of my face.” Sam grunted as he fought to push Bucky back into place.  
“STEVE! SAM HAS A GUN!” Bucky cried out fighting back against Sam with flailing arms.  
Sam let out a gasp as a well placed flail hit him in the face. “THAT IS A LIE STEVE! BUCKY IS LYING SO HE SHOULD SIT IN THE BACK!”  
Steve groaned, threw his head back and focused on Bucky “Okay, that's enough, Bucky you're sitting in the back,” Bucky let out a whine as Steve got out of the drivers side to help him in  
“ But St-,”  
“No buts! You're sitting in the back cause you were sleeping when I got here, you're gonna fall asleep again so you can stretch out in the back.” Steve reasoned with him growing stern “Now. Get. In. The. Car,”  
“You're so hot when you get firm with me.” Bucky swooned, leaning towards him trying to get Steve to soften up.  
“CAR NOW!” Steve firmly getting back into his seat leaving Sam sniggering as Bucky awkwardly clambered into the back of the car, grumbling the whole time.  
“And you,” Steve turned his gaze towards Sam with a point in his direction “You're gonna tell me exactly how you got so far away from down town. Get in the car.”

The time on the dashboard ticks over to 03:16 and as Steve predicted Bucky is drooling over his car seat, snoring softly. Sam's explanation of the nights events was mostly slurred nonsense but from what Steve could make out the duo had went out to their usual joint where they met up with Natasha. Then Tony had shown up, those two plus alcohol equals bad decisions. After that it was off to 3 different bars where they met a buff guy named Thor, who Sam did nothing but gush about his physique. “Seriously Steve, this guy makes you look like a twig, I can't stress how big his muscles were.”  
“Okay, I get it Sam.” Steve rolled his eyes as Sam continued filling him in on what happened. One thing led to another and Thor bought the group a round of some Norwegian drink and the rest of the night is a blur. 

It was smooth driving for about 5 more minutes until Steve noticed his car was running low on gas, typical, the one night he just wants to get home and get his drunks safe in bed. Luckily a gas station was on the next turn off and Steve thanked whatever higher power allowed this small moment luck.

“I need gas so I'm gonna get you two some water as well, do you guys need anything else?” Steve asked focusing mostly on Sam as he unbuckled to get out. A small mumble from the back of the car halted his movement.  
“ I wan' Doritos.” Bucky slurred, face smushed into the upholstery.  
“What flavour?”  
“All of 'em,” Bucky answers moving to sit up slightly, with a roll of his eyes Steve asks Sam again if he wants anything.  
“There's a McDonald's across the street, we should get Happy Meals. I'm very happy, happy for a Happy Meal Steve, can we get Happy Meals?” Sam yammers out and Steves' patience is wearing thin.  
“I will literally drive to the next gas station if you don't stop talking. You're getting water, that's it,okay?” Steve moves out of the car but ducks his head in to sternly say “Nobody move, I'll be five minutes.”  
He hears a muffled “ Well someone's not happy enough for a Happy Meal,” And as the bigger, sober, person he walks away.

It's 3:34 am and Steve was back to being pissed with a touch of worry.  
“Buck, where the hell is Sam?” Steve tried to soften his voice but he's closing in on being angry.  
“He went to get a Happy Meal and I told him not to cause you'd get all angry and sexy again,” Bucky's now sitting up behind the passenger side reaching toward Steve as if to stroke him.  
“Why didn't you stop him!” Steve was losing it.  
“I COULDN'T MOVE THE SEAT STEVE!” Bucky kicks said seat to demonstrate his point “And Sam said he'd give me the Happy Meal toy,” Steve was going to lose his hair thanks to these two.  
“Okay just...take the water and stay here,” Steve deposits the water next to Bucky and once again leaves his car.

It's nearing 4a.m by the time Steve makes it back to the car carrying Sam.  
“You're right Bucky, he is hot when he's angry,” Sam gives a toothy smile to Bucky as Steve shoves him into the passenger seat.  
“Right!?” Bucky giggles back.  
Steve's going to go bald, definitely. With everyone finally in the car and belted in Steve turns the key in the ignition when he pauses.  
“What is that smell? Oh god Bucky! Did you throw up?” Steve turns to face Bucky who rightfully looks guilty for once.  
“Yeah, it turns out my body wasn't as ready for Doritos as I thought.” Steve can feel the hairs leaving his scalp, yep he's going bald.

As the clock ticks over to 04:11 they finally pull up outside Steve and Bucky's apartment and Steve has never been so glad that he works out, cause carrying 2 passed out drunks up a set of stairs isn't easy. In the apartment he puts Bucky in bed and tucks Sam in next to him. He'll just crash on the couch tonight too exhausted to bother with the pull out. Steve about to head out to the living room when he hears Bucky whisper.  
“Hey, Steve?”  
“What is it Buck?” Steve turns to face him lying on the bed. Too tired to even open his eyes Bucky mumbles “We're sorry we're bad drunks, you're a good boyfriend.” Steve smiles as he leans over to place a kiss on Buckys' forehead.  
“Well, you're a pain the ass boyfriend but I love you,” The sentiment is interrupted by a voice muffled by pillows.  
“Geez you two, get a room,” Sam rolls over to bury himself further into the comforter.  
“We have a room, you're taking up my spot, asshole.” Steve laughs.  
“Hey Steve, I love you too man, we're lucky to have you.” Sam tells him before settling down and Steve kisses Sam's head as well  
“Goodnight both of you,” Steve heads for the door but stops turning to address the pair passing out on his bed.  
“Oh yeah, you guys are gonna have killer headaches in the morning but you're still cleaning up the sick in the back of my car and you're both banned from drinking for a month, m'kay, bye,” Closing the door over Steve heads to pass out on the couch.

 

bonus:

“Steve! Bucky's kicking my chair,” Sam whines as he shakes from the movement.  
“I am not! God, Sam you're such a tattle tale.” Bucky shoots back clearly rocking his knees into the back of the seat.  
“Steve, he's keeps pulling at my seatbelt,” Sam yet again whines to Steve.  
“C'MON SAM BE COOL AND LET ME CHOKE YOU!” Bucky yells yanking the seatbelt from the back.  
“One more peep outta either of you and I'm turning this car around and no one gets to have fun!” Steve slams his hands on the steering wheel, sending a glare at Bucky through the rear view mirror.  
“Boo! Was he always this much of a killjoy?” Sam asks as Bucky once again shifts to get comfortable kicking the back of Sam's' seat once again.  
“Can you move your seat?” Bucky grunts at him. Sam gives Steve a quick side glance, smirks a little and let's out a firm “No,”  
“Steeeevie, your pet birds being a dick,” Bucky pouts trying to get the sympathy vote. Sam just pushes his chair back trapping Bucky's legs and in the process jams Buckys' knees further into his back.


End file.
